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SHEWING Her ſtrange and rare CASE, great and many uncouth Afflictions, for tenne yeares together: Together, With the ſtrange and wonderfull manner how the Lord revealed himſelfe unto her, a few dayes be ore her death.

Related by her ſomtime unworthy friend, HART ON-HI.

PSAL. 66.16.

Come and heare, all yee that feare God; and I will declare what he hath done for my ſoule.

LONDON, Printed by R. Biſhop for Stephen Pilkington, and are to be ſold at his Shop next to the Red-lyon Inne in Fleet-Street, 1647.

Novemb. 12. 1646.

I Have peruſed this Diſcourſe, con­cerning Mrs Drakes dangerous ten­tations and feareful deſertions, with her bleſſed recovery, and joyfull iſſue out of all her troubles; and think it well worthy to be Printed and publiſhed, as a ſingular antidote to preſerve others in her conditi­on, from being plunged into and quite ſwallowed up with deep de­ſpaire.

Iohn Downame.

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THE matchleſſe rare Caſe, and in that kinde un­paralleld trouble of that ſometime worthy Gen­tlewoman, Mrs Ioan Drake of famous memory, wife of Francis Drake late of Eſher Eſquire; with the glorious and ſtrange concluſi­on the Lord made with her, (I believe the like never read nor heard of) was the cauſe of wri­ting2 this enſuing diſcourſe. Whoſe Caſe and trouble of ten years continuance being ſo rare and ſeldome met with; for that the Relation thereof might per­haps help ſome hard-hearted mourning Creatures hereafter, to gather heart and ſtrength, not to deſpaire (how deſperate ſoever their Caſe may ſeeme ei­ther to themſelves or others to be) I have therefore by Gods help, and for the comfort of ſuch, under­taken to ſet down here, for the glory of God, and confuſion of Satan (her maine ſtrong enemy) her Caſe, and cauſe thereof, with the progreſſe and iſſue of all, as briefly as poſſibly I could, to re­maine as a pertuall monument whilſt time laſts, of Gods great goodneſſe and infinite mercies even to the moſt hard-hearted and3 miſerable that may be. To the end, that as it was ſaid by Iames of Iob and his Caſe, Behold the Patience of Job, and what end the Lord made; ſo it may likewiſe hereafter be ſaid of this good woman, Behold the hardneſſe of heart, ſtiffneſſe and ſtoutneſſe of Mrs Drake for a long time rejecting all meanes in a long continuance, and what a comforta­ble end the Lord made with her. Wherefore it being a diſcourſe full of windings and turnings, fraught with many of Satans ſub­tilties and intricate multifarious tentations, wherein Proteus like, he according unto the occaſion, changed ſhapes, to have over­thrown this good Gentlewoman; all the ends whereof cannot (be­cauſe of the variety and ſtrang­neſſe) eaſily be knit together: I doe entreat the Readers patience4 to beare with me, if ſometimes I ſeeme to looſe my ſelfe, or be too tedious, or for want of memory and multiplicity of matter be en­forced ſometimes to bring Hyſte­ron Proteron: But howſoever the buſineſſe, if largely related, might fill up a very great volumne, I in­tend only as I am able, to gather together ſome of the moſt ſpeciall materiall things, knitting them as briefly as may be together; ſeeing by Gods mercy I was made an un­worthy Inſtrument of her recove­ry, and an eye-witneſſing Actor in all her Tragick-Comedy: (Not daring but to erect this Trophee of eternall thankfulneſſe for her) in imitation of former Wor­thies in their deliverances; I was enforced and durſt not but thus vent the buſineſſe of her rare Caſe, unto ſucceeding Poſterity.


Firſt, we will ſhew how ſhee was ſet upon and aſſaulted in the night with fear and horror, with her fore­going diſpoſition, character, and what fore-runners uſhered this her diſtemper which raiſed ſo great a ſtorme.

Secondly, By what ſtrange meanes, and way, the Lord made the Relater an unworthy Inſtrument, to have compaſsion on her, and finde her out, helping to furniſh her with the Inſtrument and means of her recovery; and what entertain­ment ſhee gave that meanes at his firſt comming unto her, and after, untill the time that ſhee revealed the Devils counſell, was contented to live, and uſe the meanes having any hope to be ſaved.

Thirdly, Her deportment and carrige from this fornamed time, untill a little before her death.


Fourthly, The preparation unto her death, with the ſtrange manner how the Lord revealed himſelfe unto her, before the ſame, the like never heard of.

1. For the firſt, ſhee was the daughter of that worthy Gentle­man William Totle Eſquire, one of the ſix Clerks of Chancery, his only Heire apparant, being likely to have enjoyed all his fortunes which were very great, according whereunto ſhee had all the excel­lent breeding, which is uſuall, and befitted a Gentlewoman iſſued from ſuch worthy Parents, whoſe too great indulgence towards her in her youth (by her own confeſ­ſion) occaſioned ſo much ſorrow unto her in her riper years, recei­ving then no correction at all.

Her cha­racter.Shee was of a low well compact­ed ſtature, of a lovely browne7 complexion, having a full nimble quick Sparrow-hawke eye, of a naturall joviall conſtitution, ac­cidentally melancholy, full of love, curteſie, mercy and meekneſſe, affable in converſation, with a deep and nimble quick pleaſant preſent wit, tender-hearted, free and bountifull, in nothing covetous but of grace: the freeſt alive from all hypocriſie, unleſſe it were to bely her ſelf, wearing her worſt ſide outmoſt, being plaine, true and tender open-hearted, modeſt, eaſily drawn with love and good words; but if oppoſed, ſtout, ſtern and inflexible, uſing the out­ward contentments of the times, yet in a very indifferent, modeſt, in­offenſive way, reſolute in her un­dertakings, valewing even then reall goodneſſe where ſhee ſaw it in any without hypocriſie,8 deteſting ſhewes without ſub­ſtance: though then ſhee were not acquainted with the power of god­lineſſe, yet had ſhee it in admira­tion, where ſhe ſaw it ſhine forth; ſo as though ſometimes in a little mirth, ſhe would vex and jeſt with the ſuppoſed worſer ſort, who at good times came to her of her neighbours; yet thoſe who were in her judgement right, ſhe uſed thus farre to open her ſelfe unto her waiting woman touching them, in this ſtrange preſaging manner.

Doeſt thou ſee theſe people, ſome of whom I doe ſo jeare at and vex? of my conſcience I ſhall one day ere I die, bee one of them; for thoſe of them who are right, are the only happy ſouls, which was a ſtrange prediction of her (even then when ſhee was ſo farre from, and con­trary9 unto them) as afterwards it came to paſſe.

Cauſe of her me­lancholy.Gods providence, and her Pa­rents pleaſure, appointed unto her a Match, but ſuch a one (thought he was a worthy fine Gentleman of good birth, parts and fortunes) yet whom at firſt ſhee could not affect, ſo as ſhe was married againſt her will (a great Over-ſight in Pa­rents) which firſt bred in her the foundation of thoſe ſtormes and tempeſts, which in time were in danger to have overthrown her. Wherein though ſhee were obe­dient and dutifull unto her Pa­rents; yet it ſtuck cloſe unto her, though her ſtrength of ſpirit and joviall temper endeavoured with all her ſtrength to have ſhaken it off, out-worn it, and by all meanes to have out-faced it, without ſem­blance of diſcontent, by merry10 company and divers journeyes (which uſually divert melancholy thoughts) as though there had been no ſuch matter. But griefe being like unto fire, which though for a time ſmothered, yet could not long bee concealed, her diſcon­tens did ſecretly work upon her a habit of ſadneſſe in midſt of her mirth with her friends, as Salomon ſhewes than even in laughter the heart may be ſad.

Cauſe of her di­ſtemper.About this time not long af­ter her marriage ſhe was brought to bed of a daughter (a dear daugh­ter unto her) becauſe in that deli­very being much wronged by her Midwiffe, ſhee was ever after troubled with fumes and ſcurvie vapors mounting up unto her head, which bred in her for the moſt part a continuall head-ach, like unto a megrum, together with11 ſomewhat like unto a fire continu­ally burning at her ſtomack, which no phyſick could remove, or was not Gods pleaſure it ſhould; the which drew her towards a more conſtant conſtitution of ſadneſſe and diſtemper, though yet with her uſuall ſtrength of ſpirit and chear­full diſpoſition, ſhee out-faced, as though all had been well. But a fire of diſcontent being kindled full of ſad thoughts in her; which bred and encreaſed all the time ſhe lay in of her daughter; thus ſhortly after it fell out, That

Her Father and Mother being very indulgent towards her in this Caſe, and both of them being with her, when at a time ſhe was ill at her Houſe at Eſher in Surrey; her Mother to comfort and heart­en her up, then lying one night with her; It came to paſſe that in12 the fore-part of the night ſhee fell aſleep, but not long after fell out into terrible ſhricks & out-cryes, to this purpoſe,The firſt grand tempeſt ſhee en­dured. that ſhee was un­done, undone, ſhee was damned, and a caſt away, and ſo of neceſsity muſt needs goe to Hell, and therewith ſhook, dropt down with ſweat, and wept exceedingly: Wherewith her good Mother Mrs Totle much troubled, being a very religious tender-hearted Gentlewoman, did give her many good and comfor­table exhortations, to be quiet, to truſt in God; not to believe illu­ſions, telling her, that the Devill was a liar, and ſo fell a praying with her,A ſtrange change. ſhee being in ſhew well recovered and pacified. Which being paſt, ſhe fell aſleep againe, and wakened as full of extraordi­nary joyes, as formerly ſhee had been of terrors; rejoycing exceed­ingly,13 and then told her Mother, What a wonderful comfortable dreame ſhee had been in, and how from an Angel ſhe was aſſured of her ſalvation; that now all her former feares ſhee ſaw were falſe, now ſhe would doubt no more, being aſſured to goe unto Heaven; and ſo prayed againe with her Mo­ther.

Some houres after this ſhe fell aſleep againe for an houre and more (as her Mother told the Re­lator) but at her awaking was now in a more fearfull caſe then ever,The tempeſt begins roughly. in a fearefull trembling and ſweat, ſhaking exceedingly and crying out, That now ſhee was a forelorne creature, being aſſuredly damned, without hope of mercy, without all remedy, confident that ſhee muſt needs goe unto hell; with ſhricks and loud Cryes, the bed ſhaking,14 yea, the whole chamber ſeeming to rock and reele: Which breeding to her Mother, much fear, amaze­ment and grief, in that it was now paſt her skill to faſten upon her daughter any thing which might allay, comfort, or quiet her diſtem­per ſhee now was in. In which wo­full poſture ſhee ſtill continued, notwithſtanding all the comforts of perſwaſions vented either by her Mother or any others; all which were in vaine, there being joyned with her ſadneſſe and di­ſtemper, ſome out-rage now and then, abſtinence from meat as much as might be; ſtrange deſpe­rate ſpeeches, unruly carriage, far from her former naturall conſti­tution: ſometime ſlighting and laughing at all ſaid unto her, they now not daring to truſt her alone, but to have her watched continu­ally15 night and day by two Gentle­women by turns, moſt of the bolts and locks being taken off in the roomes, leſt Satan ſhould have circumvented them. Shee in the meane time all this while living in much diſcontent, againſt her will, but that ſhe was ſo watcht and tended, that ſhee could by no meanes hurt her ſelfe, never left alone, but over-awed with O­verſeers who were jealous of her ruine. In this Caſe ſhee with much adoe was brought to eat, but ſparingly, very muſing and ſilent; but when ſhe was by her Husband, Father or Mother, much urged to the contrary; who by their autho­rity only prevailed much with her: now at length growing deſperate­ly hopeleſſe, refuſing all meanes, ſlighting and ſcorning to ſpeake with any Miniſters, all who came16 to her, ſhee ſhaking them off, as we ſee a great Maſtiffe to turne off many ſhall Curres; laughing at them, and ſending them away with much deriſion and diſcon­tent; which ſhee of purpoſe de­lighted to doe, ſo to diſcourage all of them, that they might have no minde to return again: So as ſhee wearied out all who came un­to her, who left her as a creature hopeleſſe of recovery. In which ſad Poſture, now in her own eyes and moſt of others, hopeleſſe and helpleſſe, being the aſtoniſhment of Husband, Father, Mother, and of all her friends; wee will now for a while leave her unto her keepers, to ſhew in the next place, the ſecond thing propounded; How ſtrangely the Lord cauſed the Relater to bee a meanes to finde her out, bring one of a thouſand un­to17 her, and what ſtrange entertain­ment ſhe gave him at his firſt com­ming unto her, to declare unto her, both what her iniquity, and righ­teouſneſſe was.

How God cauſed to finde her out.As by Gods good Providence the Relater was one day at dinner in Iſleworth, at the houſe of the Lady Scudamore, where the late worthy Miniſter Dr Burges the Elder then alſo was, whoſe help ſhee had rejected. Amongſt other diſcourſes there interpoſed this al­ſo of Mrs Drakes great diſtemper, pitifull ſtrange unuſuall Caſe, how deſperate it was, and what a great work of mercy it would bee to be a meanes any way to help her. It then being concluded by all, that if Mr Iohn Dod of Aſhby, could be entreated or won to take ſo much paines, under God he were the on­ly fit perſon, with his ſo milde,18 meek and mercifull ſpirit, do deale with hers, which was ſo out of tune and off hooks: upon whoſe prayers and paines, more good ſucceſſe might be expected, then any one they could then think of. This motion though for the time neglected, yet after a fortnight wrought ſo ſtrongly, day and night upon the Relater, that he could have no reſt until hee had moved the buſineſſe unto Mr Dod then in Town; who modeſtly put it off as a buſineſſe beyond his ſtrength and leiſure to wait upon, yet being contented to ſee her and ſpeak with her. Whereupon the Relater then wrote unto her Huſ­band (a ſtranger unto him) to this purpoſe; that hearing of the ſtrange Caſe and danger his wife now was in, out of mercy unto her, he had procured, the fitteſt man19 known to come to ſee her, and do his beſt to help her according to his ability, one Mr Dod Miniſter of Cannons-Aſhby in Northamp­tonſhire. Hee then after enquiring of Mr Dod, found ſuch a generall good report of him, that he ſud­denly came unto the Relaters chamber in the White-Friers, where Mr Dod at that time was, who acquainting himſelf with him, entreated his help and company to viſite his wife, and ſo took us both along with him unto his houſe.

But it is ſtrange to heare what ſuttlety the Devill then uſed,A ſud­den de­vice of Satan. and uncouth entertainment he cauſed her then to give unto him: for, ſhee being in the dining roome above, having no knowledge of his comming (which was concea­led from her) yet as we came neare unto the door below, ſhe ſudden­ly20 flung up ſtaires unto the next chamber above, and ſhut her ſelfe in: Whereupon her Husband took the great iron forke in his hand, and run up after her, threat­ning to beat down the door, if ſhe would not open it. Who ſeeing him reſolute ſo to doe, at length opened the doore and let them in; her Husband then getting betwixt her and the door, they both kneeled, and Mr Dod (as his cuſtome in great matters was) kneeled and went to prayer with­out ſpeaking of one word unto her: at which time ſhee ſtood and would not kneele, untill the latter end of the ſame, when ſhee alſo conformed her ſelfe, and kneeled with them. Prayer being done, Mr Dod ſaid nothing unto her, but in her hearing uttered ſome ſpeeches concerning her Caſe,21 unto her Husband, tending unto her comfort and encouragement for her to make uſe off: and ſo did both before and at dinner, ex­pecting from her ſome ſpeeches to have given ſome pertinent occa­ſion for further diſcourſe with her, which ſhee at that time omitting, he ſupplied with other ſeaſonable diſcourſes for her good, touching his experiences in the like kinde, of the Devils ſuttleties and the danger of keeping his councell, with the advantages accrewing unto him thereby; whereunto ſhee patiently attended. Dinner being done, he being asked in his cham­ber at her houſe (where hee now was perſwaded to lodge) what he thought of the buſineſſe? made this gratious hopefull Reply; very well, becauſe the Devill was afraid, run away, and durſt not ſtand to it.


Shee ſeemes to neglect and de­piſe pray­er.That night after ſhee was a bed, he was brought in by her husband to pray by her; but ſhee ſeem'd as though ſhee would not hear, hid her ſelfe over head and eares in the bed: notwithſtanding which he went on conſtantly in his determi­nation unto the end thereof. The next day at his comming, hee ſet in to ſpeak with her; at which time ſhee replyed nimbly and ſtrongly, uſing to purpoſe all, or much of the Devills rhethorike taught her againſt her ſelfe; yea, and alledged many Scriptures,Strange. which ſhee had never read, but only as tumbling and toſſing over the Bible (as her cuſtome was) to finde places againſt her ſelfe, ſhee had hit upon many; which by her nimbleneſſe and ſtrength of wit and Satans help, ſhee had learned to wreſt, and preſſe hard againſt23 her ſelfe. A ſad ſore and wofull conditi­on for the time.But in all her diſcourſes with him, the upſhot of all ſtill was, That ſhee was a damned Reprobate, muſt needs goe unto Hell to live for ever; that her heart was harder then an Adamant or Anvile, that God had forſaken her, and given her over unto a reprobate ſenſe, her hard heart could not repent, and that in all her actions ſhee but heapt up wrath againſt the day of wrath to her further condemnation; and that in that ſhee could not grieve, nor be ſorrowfull for that wofull eſtate ſhee was now in, this ſhew the deſperate­neſſe thereof; that it was in vaine, and too late for her to uſe any meanes: and therefore, that ſhee would uſe none, nor ever goe to Church againe. That it was need­leſse, fruitleſſe and in vaine, for him or any body elſe to looſe their time or labor any more with her or her24 occaſions, the Decree of her rejection and damnation being paſt and irre­vocable: And therefore, all her comfort and portion being in this life, ſhee was reſolved to ſpend the remainder of her time in all jollity and merriment, denying her ſelfe of no wordly comforts; and therefore, wiſhed him to let her alone, for it was impoſsible for him to doe her any good, nor ſhee would not either be ruled or adviſed by him; with a great deale of the like ſcurvie rotten ſtuffe, and that ſhee was quite deſtitute of all naturall af­fection unto Husband, Father, Mo­ther, Children, and every body elſe, having in briefe no love either to God or man; and therefore perſwa­ded him to leave her, not to pray for her, nor come any more at her.

Here was a ſad diſcourſe, with heavie accuſations againſt her ſelf,25 had all been true; but the Devill being a lyar, and the Father of lies, made her thus fiercely and unjuſtly accuſe and charge her ſelfe in ſuch rigor: for even then ſhee feared Hell fire, quaking ſometimes, and trembling at it, venting her ſelfe unto her friends in private, and weeping bitterly, ſhee uſed to ſay, O doe not yee pity me, who muſt goe to live in Hell torments for ever? Beſides,A ſtrange hypocrie unuſuall. even then ſhee was piti­full and mercifull unto others, but in ſecret ſo hid and clokt with words and ſhewes of the contrary, that it was treaſon againſt her for any ſhe entruſted, to bewray any part or parcell of her goodneſſe; becauſe ſhee would gladly have beene thought paſt hope, and praying for, which made her ear­neſtly to begge of every one not to pray for her, it being that the26 Devill aymed at, that ſhee might, paſt hope,A new invention of Satan. finally diſpaire. For, for two years together, by her good­will will ſhee would not bee prayd for, uſing many times at her Mo­thers uſuall time of Prayer to ſend ſuddenly for her, of purpoſe to in­terrupt her, who if ſhee came not preſently, as ſent for; when ſhee came, asking her pleaſure, ſhee uſed to reply, now I have nothing to ſay unto you, for you have been at your Matins. But to return to Mr Dods progreſſe with her; It was yet none at all, ſhe remained ſtill the ſame, ſeemed not to hear or regard his ſpeeches and words ſpoken; would laugh and jeſt at all he ſaid in deriſion: In her thoughts likening him unto Ananias, one whom at a play in the Black-Friers ſhee ſaw ſcoft at, for a holy bro­ther of Amſterdam; and when he27 look pitifully upon her and re­prove her for ſuch ſtrange carri­ages and ſpeeches, telling her what a ſhamefull thing it was, ſo to laugh and jeſt at heavenly things; ſhee uſually Replyed, Why then, ſeeing you ſee what a wicked creature I am, why doe you trouble your ſelfe any more with me?

Divers faſts were kept for her in private,Another of his ſubtile devices. the next Chamber above hers, both then and divers times after, in midſt whereof the Devill ſo made her reſtleſſe, that ſhee would come up to the doore, di­ſturbe them, of purpoſe, and make them believe that if the deſiſted not, ſhe would throw her ſelf down ſtaires headlong. Yea once ſhee being a bed, and he at prayer, ſhe to make him leave off, took a bed-ſtaffe, and threatned to knock him on the head, but did not. All theſe28 and many moe tricks the Devill u­ſed, ſtill upon occaſion to ſerve his turne, changing his weapons, ſo as ſcarcely could it be known at what ward to finde him long: ſo to ſhew his malice, did he change his poſture and weapons.

Now ſhee would toughly di­ſpute the buſineſſe,She holds faſt her dolefull concluſi­ons. but all to no purpoſe, ſhe retaining thoſe devi­liſh concluſions faſtned in her ſtill. So that Mr Dod wearied out thus, having ſtaied a Moneth with her departed home, ſtayed away a Moneth and returned againe, do­ing thus three or foure times to­gether: yet found no amendement, but ſtill the ſame arguments ſtiffe­ly maintained over and over a­gaine a hundred times together, without any good (in ſhew) effect upon her, who could not in two yeares time be won or perſwaded29 to come to Church or Sacrament, or to uſe any meanes at all; but car­ried her ſelfe as a deſperate for­lorne creature, notwithſtanding which the over-coming thoughts and terrors of Hell did much af­fright her; ſo as gladly ſhe would have had a doore of hope opened unto her:A nice prety ſto­ry, pro­ving that ſhe wiſht for ſal­vation. For, a Kitchin-Maide ſhe kept, who had both wit and me­mory enough to do and retaine a meſſage; ſhee would uſually ſend unto divers Preachers with Meſ­ſages of enquiry touching her (concealing her name,) Whether ſuch and ſuch a creature, without Faith, Hope, love to God or man, hard-hearted, without naturall af­fection, who had rejected all meanes, nor could perform any, or ſubmit unto the ſame, with many the like aggra­vations (bad enough you may ima­gine) yet might have any hope to go30 to heaven? Who ſtill brought unto her ſuch returns tending to hope­full encouragement: that ſuch like and much worſe (though as bad as Manaſſeth) might by the mercy of God be received into fa­vour, converted and ſaved, which privately did much allay her ſpirit; for no worſer returns of her ſecret meſſages were brought unto her from any ſhee had ſent unto.

For all this,A fur­ther ex­tent of the De­vils ma­lice. yet did the Devill hold her cloſe unto his maine end of deſperation, to have made her ſelf away: For ſhe ſwallowed down many great pins, ſo to have di­ſpatch't her ſelfe; all which by Gods mercy without hurting paſ­ſed through her: And being for­bid Oranges (as naught for her) ſhee made ſhift by the foreſaid Maide to have forty brought un­to her, ſo to have ſped her ſelfe;31 but it ſo pleaſed God, that theſe proved excellent medicines unto her, purging away abundance of black ugly filthy matter, which made her to look much better. Shee uſed alſo now and thenat meales, to ſhift a knife ſecretly in a napkin, and then to ſlip it up in then inſide of her arme; but being watched and taken therewith ſhee left off ſo doing, thus continuing, untill ſhee had in a manner weari­ed out every body: for, the ſhorter the Devils reign was, he played the more tricks, making her by fits to be the more raging and troubleſome unto her ſelfe and others.

A ſtrange farewell.Now as is ſaid, Mr Dod in a manner wearied out with her, as he was about to goe home for a while, and to take leave, ſhe gave unto him this rude farewell, To pray him to get him gone, to return32 no more unto her, enquiring at him what warrant he had, being a holy religious man, who ſhould give good example unto others, to leave his Calling, Houſe and Family ſo long, and to come to her, where he was but an unwelcome Intruder, having no hope to doe her any good? Which ſpeech was ſo ſet on with ſuch an edge of vehemencie (ſpoken as it appeared againſt her will to prove him only) bred in him ſuch aſto­niſhment, as reſolving to follow her counſell, hee made her this ſhort Reply, That this was but a bad requitall of all his paines and love unto her, to have no more thanks for his labour, but to be chid out of doores, that hee was very ſenſible of her reproofe and diſmiſsion, and therefore meant hereafter to ſtay at home, and look unto his own mat­ters, not troubling her any more:33 Which ſpeech it ſeemed touched her to the quick; for though to diſ­courage him and trie him, ſhe had made him ſuch an untoward ſpeech, yet was ſhee inwardly very ſorry for what was done: Only be­fore his departure, ſhee took him aſide, deſiring to ſpeak with him in private; when ſhee told him, that now ere his departure ſhee would deale freely with him, and ſhew the cauſe and ground of all her diſtem­pers and trouble, and what juſt cauſe ſhee had thus to have com­plained, as hopeleſſe, enjoyning him ſilence. A way opened for her cure.And ſo in her own chamber, none but he being pre­ſent, ſhe opened her whole heart ſincerely, ſo as hee perceived that ſhee had concealed nothing from him of all that was in her heart; which made (now that the Devils counſell was out and diſ­cloſed)34 to conceive good hope of her recovery.

For this quite marres, and is in danger to over throw all ſuch perſons,Danger of concei­ling the Devils counſell. whilſt the Devill ſo holds them in bondage, as to make them conceal his counſell all the while, having this advantage there­by, as to make mountaines of mole-hils, and of mole-hils to make migh­ty mountains; never ſuffering them to come unto the knowledge of the quality and nature of their diſ­eaſe, whilſt the thing oppreſſing and ſeeming great unto them, is uſually little, and nothing at all in reſpect of that he makes it; ſome­times but a lie, a deluſion, ſuch as the parties themſelves upon ſuch diſcoveries in relating become aſhamed of; As in ſome ſort it fell out with this good womans Caſe, which was nothing in a manner in35 regard of that the Devil urged and perſwaded her; it was, he proving a ſtrong lyer unto her, and his ſuggeſtion only a meare falſe illu­ſion as will hereafter appear. Then unto all that which ſhee had then vented unto him, he then made her only this generall Reply, That ſhe was much miſtaken and deluded in the quality, kinde and nature of her Caſe, that the Devill had thus far tormented her ſpirit with a ſtrong abuſe in corrupting her judgement; and encenſing her ſo unjuſtly againſt her ſelfe, ſetting her affections on fire, by his injected wild-fire temp­tations. That he made no doubt of her recovery; but that now being acquainted with her Caſe and minde, hee would goe home and con­ſult with God what were fitteſt an­ſwers for the ſame; returning ere long againe if God were ſo pleaſed:36 then to endeavor to ſatisfie and heal all her doubtings: In the meane time, untill then, enjoyning her chearefulneſſe, patience, moderation in all things before her Husband and Parents, and to attempt no more violence againſt her ſelfe; all which ſhee faithfully promiſed and kept.

Still ſhee holds the maine concluſi­on.Hee being gone, in his abſence ſhee carried her ſelfe diſcreetly and modeſtly, not refuſing to ſpeak with any of thoſe Divines who in the interim came to viſit her; and would ſit and diſpute with them a long time together, but ſtill in the old bias, holding her ſtrong maine concluſions, the fabrick whereof appeared to be ſo ſtrongly rooted in her, that they ſeemed unremoveable, all who, as appeared, did no good unto her, ſave ſo much as they could to per­ſwade37 her from ſuch ſtiffe peremp­tory concluſions againſt her ſelfe, and from prying into Gods ſe­crets, preſuming to know thoſe things which God in this life re­veales not unto any, but reſerves as his own high prerogative, only to know what his decree is touch­ing the everlaſting ſtate of the Creature to come: affirming that this knowledge which ſhe preten­ded to have thereof was falſe, and that this revelation, was only known in the ſanctified uſe of meanes, which ſhee ſo farre refu­ſed, as ſhe could not be perſwaded to goe to Church by any, though they much urged her unto it: On­ly now ſhe would kneele and joyn in prayer with them, but by no meanes in ſinging of any Pſalme, which ſhee affirmed not to belong unto any in her Caſe, being now38 very ſad and retired, and now and then in weeping fits, and ſome­times in ſhewes of jollity and mirth, ſo by turnes it pleaſed her to out-face her preſent miſery.

Patience, modera­tion and milde dealing much prevails with ſuch.But this as a Catholicon we ob­ſerve in dealing with her, that the more patient we were, to ſuffer her to complaine and bemoane her ſelfe, repeat one thing over a hun­dred times as ſhee uſed, over and over again, giving her good words, uſing much meekneſſe, affability and ſervice unto her, even in her moſt untoward croſſe carriages, this got much ground upon her ſpirit, and brought her to doe many things which no harſh croſſe­neſſe could poſſibly effect with her. And therefore this couſe was now taken, not to vex her any more, or urge her with perſwaſions to goe to Church, or to doe any thing39 ſo diſpleaſing unto her, but to goe along with her ſpirit, with patience abounding with love, mercy, good words and the like, untill ſhee were convinced in judgement, when they needed not to hale or pull her, Duties would then come off freely: For indeed, this is the undoing of many poore ſouls in the like, or any diſtempers, to chide, rate, and urge them to much; which is a croſſe way, diſpleaſing and unproſperous, yea, diſproportionable unto that courſe Chriſt takes (whom wee ſhould imitate) not to break the bruiſed reed, nor quench the ſmoak­ing flax; and a croſſe way, To make judgement return unto victory: In which Caſe, Iacobs pace with his flocks, with ſuch, is the beſt and ſafeſt way to drive them gently; eſpecially thoſe who are with40 young, in whom Chriſt is now but abreeding and forming, that ſo he may (as the Prophet ſpeaks, Iſa. 53) ſee of the travell of his ſoule, and be ſatisfied: And indeed, ſuch harſh ſpirits who are too quick with ſuch poor ſouls being too nimble with them before they know their diſ­eaſe, are but like rude Surgions, or unskilfull Phyſitians, who venter to give phyſick before they know the ground of the diſeaſe; who many times in place of curing, doe ei­ther kill, or ſo much the more ulcer their wounds.

Hitherto we have ſeen Satan malicious,A change in her occaſions. violent, ſubtile, various in his temptations, changing ſhapes, by all meanes ſtriving to have overthrown this good ſoule abuſe her judgement, affections, fancy, and beſt reaſon to fight a­gainſt her ſelfe; notwithſtanding41 all which, the Lord miraculouſly preſerved her, was with her in, and brought her through this fiery affliction, to wonder and admiration: Wherefore, if the Reader will have a little more pa­tience, he ſhall ſee how the Lord overthrew all thoſe ſtrong holds, which the enemy had by his wild­fire unreſiſted temptions, and fiery darts injected in this good creature; which being not pre­ſently caſt forth againe (as wild­fire ſhould be) thus enflamed her affections and endeavours againſt her ſelfe; as in part hath been and God willing ſhall be related.

Tempta tion. 1For firſt, he faſtned this temp­tation upon her, as his great maine Bulwork, That ſhe had ſinned that great unpardonable ſinne againſt the holy Ghoſt; and therefore, that it was in vaine for her, either to uſe42 any meanes for ſalvation, or hope for it; and therefore, that it were fruitleſſe and in vaine for her to heare the word, read, pray and the like; which hee wonderfull faſtly had radicated in her.

Tempta tion. 2Hereupon, hee inferred that by Gods Decree ſhee was a Reprobate, a caſt away, appointed for damna­tion; being ſhee was ſuch a hard-hearted impenitent ſinner, not being able to repent: and therefore was a treaſurer up in all ſhee did of wrath againſt the day of wrath and the revelation of Gods juſt Judgements againſts her: and therefore, ſeeing that ſhee muſt eternally periſh, living for heaping up ſin only for aggravation of her puniſhments, therefore to make her ſelfe away, the ſooner the better: which temptation a long time ſtuck faſt, ſeeming unremovable.


Tempta tion. 3From whence Satan made this third deduction (like a Sophiſti­call Logitian, begging the Que­ſtion) that therefore now it was in vaine to uſe any meanes at all; but ſeeing her portion was now only in this life, therefore to deny her ſelfe no manner of pleaſures or jollity and mirth, but to caſt off all theſe ſad and ſoure things of holy duties per­forming, which were to no purpoſe, now that the irrevocable Decree was paſt, which was unchangeable: And therefore, if ſhee ſhould bee ſaved ſhee ſhould bee ſaved how­ſoever, and that God would ſoften her heart, and give her grace to uſe the meanes: But that the feare­fulneſſe of her eſtate did ſhew (hee ſuggeſted) the contrary, that all her endeavors would prove in vaine; this ſtuck hard a long time.


Now againſt any of theſe, no­thing could bee faſtned upon her againſt them, which was not pre­ſently ſhook off again: But eſpeci­ally in that firſt mentioned of the Sin againſt the Holy Ghoſt, here­in ſhee kept cloſe the Devils coun­ſell, revealing the ſame at firſt unto none, but unto Mr Dod; though afterwards of her ſelfe three years after, being in a good humor, ſhee acquainted the Rela­tor herewith; and more alſo then he hath thought fit to vent abroad (as unneceſſary) giving him leave to publiſh and make known after her death ſo much of her Caſe as might in ſome ſuch miſery be uſe­full unto others.

After this Mr Dod at his ap­pointed time returned, having ſe­riouſly pondered all her buſineſs, & digeſted the ſame, and was joyful­ly45 welcomed of her friends, though by her in a muddy ſtrange way (former tentations by that time, having againe growne ſomewhat ſtrong upon her) when yet hee in his uſuall mercifull way, cheared her up, encouraging her what poſ­ſibly he could. And ſo in ſome few dayes after fell flatly upon the buſineſſe, how to beat down and convince her erroneous opinions wherein ſhee was ſo ſetled, and wherein ſhee thought her ſelfe moſt ſecure in her owne judge­ment, unremoveably ſetled.

The ſinne againſt the Holy Ghoſt diſcuſſed and ſta­ted.The maine & grand matter trou­bling her, and quite unhooking her off from all manner of duties (as hath been ſaid) was, That ſhe had ſinned that unpardonable ſin againſt the holy Ghoſt, which ſhee firmly believed: Whereunto Maſter Dod thus replyed, directly croſſing all46 her thoughts herein, in the nega­tive, affirming that ſhe neither had ſinned this ſinne, nor was ever hi­therto ſo qualified, as to be guilty thereof; which ſeemed unto her very ſtrange to prove, but was eaſily done. For, he ſhewed unto her, our of Heb. 6.4. That thoſe who commit that ſin fight againſt their convinced enlighting, having taſted the good word of God, and the powers of the world to come, having alſo taſted of the heavenly gift, being made partakers of the holy Ghoſt; who in their practiſe crucifie to themſelves the Sonne of God afreſh, and put him to an open ſhame; and trample upon the blood of the Covenant, mali­ciouſly oppoſing the known truth, in a conſtant courſe remorſeleſſe unto the end: having lived & thri­ven under powerfull means, which47 yet they ſlight, maliciouſly and purpoſly oppoſe and perſecute. But that ſhee being ſtill in her na­tural eſtate,A ſtrong aſſump­tion. by her own confeſſion being farre from this enlightning, never having taſted of this heaven­ly gift, nor of the powers of the world to come, was never thus qualified, and ſo had never, neither could have committed this ſinne: ſo that her temptations and feares in this kinde were but meer deluſi­ons onely. And for that other ſort who committed this ſinne, with­out the former inward illumina­tion and taſte, ſuch as were the Scribes and Phariſees, Julian the Apoſtate, and the like, who malici­ouſly perſecuted and blaſphemed Chriſt, notwithſtanding that by his Doctrine and Miracles they were convinced of his Diety; of this he ſhewed her, ſhee could not48 be guilty of, All ſhe could alleadge againſt her ſelfe, conſiſting only in a matter of thoughts, which could not without action and former qualifi­cation bee that ſinne, or within the compaſſe thereof: Which were on­ly things wrapt up in that we call (tentatio Foeda) ſtrange injected thoughts of God, as Rom. 1.23. repreſenting him to the fancy in abominable ſimilitudes, likening him unto the vileſt and baſeſt things; which were only Satans wild fire tentations; for which ſeeing ſhee even then, and ſince, abominated them, being ſorry for them, Satan muſt anſwer for, they being hers no further then as ſhee entertained and allowed of them. And alſo, that theſe thoughts be­ing thought of and injected be­twixt the top and bottome of the hill whereupon her Fathers houſe49 ſtood, never breaking forth into any ſpeech or action which ſhee was ſorry for, could not be any ſuch ſinne as ſhee imagined; and therfore prayed her to content her ſelfe and to reſt ſatisfied, and not ſuffer the Devill to delude and torment her any more in this kinde.

All this diſcourſe ſhee heard willingly without replication un­till he had finiſhed what he would ſay, when ſhee being very ratio­nall and convinced of the truth of what hee had delivered, acknow­ledged her error, and Satans delu­ſion, promiſing no more to enter­taine any ſuch like thoughts of that ſinne,A fur­ther com­plaint. But withall ſhee told him, that it was no matter for this, though ſhee were free thereof, yet ſhe had other ſinnes enough to damne her, and was aſſuredly a Reprobate50 and caſt away, being ſhee could not love God, nor any other creature, being devoid of all naturall affec­tion, and given over to a Repro­bate ſenſe, ſo as ſhee was moſt cer­taine that the Decree of God againſt her was paſt, being that ſhee had no heart or power to performe any ho­ly duty, but was like a creature ſtarke dead, yea twice dead, good for nothing but for hell fire; where­with ſhee ſometimes would laugh and ſmile; but wee muſt conceive that even in the midſt of this laugh­ter the heart was ſad; for in pri­vate not long after ſhee would have ſore fits of weeping.

In vaine it was now to diſpute with her,Know­ledge of Gods Decree denyed unto any one. or perſwade her in any thing untill her judgement was convinced & rectified in that mat­ter of the Decree of God: For ſhee flung off all with ſeeming aſſurance51 of her knowledge being ſure that the Decree of her reprobation was paſt, of her rejection whereof ſhe was ſure and certaine: Therefore, this being the next ſtrong hold to be battered down, he bent in the next place all his ſtrength this way, Denying unto her that it was poſsible either for the Devill, or any other creature to know the Decree of God, either for ſalvation or repro­bation; but that this revelation came in the uſe of meanes God bleſſing the ſame; for which cauſe all muſt uſe the meanes who would bee ſaved, not medling with the Decree of God, nor prying into his ſecrets; for which then was al­ledged that excellent Scripture, Deut. 30.12. That what they were to performe and know, Was not in heaven, that we ſhould ſay, Who ſhall goe up for us to heaven, and52 bring it unto us, that we may heare it and doe it: Neither is it beyond the ſea, that thou ſhouldeſt ſay, Who ſhall goe over the ſea for us? &c. But the word is very nigh unto thee, in thy mouth, and in thy heart that thou mayeſt doe it. Further hee urged, that if thus much were certainly know by her, he ſhewed her,Argu ment. 1it muſt be by a Spirit of revela­tion; demanding of her, what ſpirit had revealed thus much unto her? If the ſpirit of the Devill (as it could bee no other) then he was a liar and the father of lies, as Chriſt Ioh. 8.44. ſpeaks, hee ſpeaking of his own and not from God, there­fore not to believed. And as the for the Spirit of God (he ſhewed) who only ſearches knowes and re­veales unto us the deep things of God, 1 Cor. 2.10. none but hee knowing the things of God, not53 any creature, This holy Spirit (he ſhewed her) had no ſuch office aſ­ſigned him of Chriſt in the word to be a ſpirit of diſcouragement to revealed reprobation, being the Com­forter appointed to lead the Saints in all Truth, to reveale and tell things to come and teach us all things, Ioh. 14.26. Argu ment. 2This were di­rectly againſt his nature, miſſion, and office, and the Decree of God, Thus to beat men off the uſe of meanes, diſcouraging them in the good way, who muſt wait and lie at the doore of mercy ſtill, untill the Lords good time and pleaſure were revealed and known in the uſe of meanes. And this alſo was preſſ'd unto her further,Argu ment. 3what a horrible blaſphemy and impiety it were, either to honour the De­vill ſo farre, or aſſume unto her ſelfe by his meanes, the knowledge54 of things to come; this being that which was only proper unto Ieho­vah himſelfe, by his ſpirit to ſhew and reveale; adviſing her to be­ware in this kinde, not to encreaſe the wrath of God againſt her, ſee­ing God, Iſa. 44.7. & 46.10. diffe­rencing himſelfe from Idols, and all their diſcoveries, is to know things that are come and a comming, declaring the end from the begin­ning, and from ancient times the things that were not yet done: From all which iſſued this deduction, that ſhee was infinitly abuſed in this ſtrange conception, and that the Devill or ſhee from him were not certaine of any things to come (unleſſe revealed by the Spirit of God) ſhee having from thence no ſuch revelation; that therefore ſhe was by Satan utterly cozened and abuſed in the matter of Gods55 Decree, and ſo was bound to uſe the meanes, truſt and wait upon God therein; ſhee being his crea­ture, to let him do what he pleaſed with her, either in life or death.

This ſtrong fiery dart thus re­pulſed quenched, ſhee became alſo convinced in this point, that only God (not the Devill) could reveale his owne Counſels and Decrees; and therefore, that per­haps ſhee might bee deceived in this her ſtrong confidence in that kinde: But ſtill retaining the third, That her indiſpoſition unto all man­ner of goodneſſe,Satan holds hard ha­ving once got ground. proneneſſe unto all manner of evill, her naturall temper and compoſition of minde, not able to uſe any meanes, or take any paines for heaven, too evidently demon­ſtrated that ſhee had no part or portion there, and therefore that ſhe had better leave off all then labor56 in vaine:Anſw. 1Hereunto anſwer was made, That God though he had Decreed to ſave mankinde by the meanes of a Mediator, yet in his good wiſe Providence had ſo or­dered the conveyance of our ſalva­tion (as Auſtin ſpeaks) that he who made us without us,The uſe of meanes is ſtrongly preſſed upon her, to bee ſa­ved. will not ſave us without us: & therefore that all our life time we muſt be humble ſutors, labourers after, endeavourers and ſtrivers after that ſalvation which he hath appointed for us, uſing all thoſe meanes conſtantly, and not to lie ſtill in a ditch without en­deavouring to riſe, and to cry Lord help us; ſuch a one hee told her did worthily periſh. It was further now alſo preſſ'd unto her, that God now after that miracle of all miracles, in the ſen­ding his Sonne to aſſume our fleſh and ſave us, now ordinarily57 wrought not the ſame miracu­louſly, but by ordinary concurring meanes and endeavours revealed in the word; that as thoſe who in the Wilderneſſe were ſtung by the fiery Serpents, were not healed unleſſe they looked up unto the Brazen Serpent; no more any now could obtaine ſalvation un­leſſe they believed in chriſt, its antitype:Argu ment or motive. 1And that therefore, if ſhe uſed not the meanes, but rejected and wilfully withſtood the ſame, as there was no hope any way of ſal­vation; ſo if ſhe uſed the meanes, there being hope, and many pro­miſes annexed to the ſame, there was good hope of her ſalvation;Argu ment or motive. 2And put the caſe (which hee deny­ed) that ſhe muſt needs periſh; yet much better it were to periſh in a way of obedience and duty full of hope all the way, and uſually ſuc­ceſſefull,58 whereunto were annexed many promiſes wherein the truth of god who cannot lie, but is faithfull in all his promiſes is engaged, then in a wilfull way of diſobedience. Argu ment or motive. 3That all experiences ſince the be­ginning of the world have ſhewed, that it never yet was in vaine, or unſucceſſefull, but alwayes advan­tageous and proſperous to uſe the meanes, waite and depend upon God; yea, though it were as long and longer then the impotent man, Ioh. 5. lay at the poole of Betheſda, ere hee had help: And therefore ſeeing her caſe was now juſt like thoſe foure Leapers who ſate at the Gate of Samaria, 2 Kin. 4. Motive 4Note: preſſed home.Who being like to periſh in that great famine, reſolved, if, and ſince they muſt needs periſh, if they ſate ſtill there; but if they ad­ventured into the Campe of the59 Aramites, they might peradven­ture be ſaved, (at the worſt but die) at their approach thither, fin­ding the Amarites fled, they had choyce of the ſpoyle. So if ſhee uſed not the meanes, but deſpiſed them, ſhee muſt of neceſſity pe­riſh; but if uſed, ſhee might no queſtion be ſaved. And ſo to this effect were urged thoſe places, Micah. 2.7. O thou that art called by the name of the houſe of Jacob, is the Spirit of the Lord ſtraigthned? and thoſe his doings? doe not my words doe good to them that walk uprightly? and this, Seek yee the Lord, all yee meek of the earth, which have wrought his judge­ment: ſeek Righteouſneſſe and ſeek meekneſſe; It may bee yee ſhall bee hid in the day of the Lords anger, Zeph. 2.3. And ſo that of Amos 4.12. Therefore this will60 I doe unto thee, O Iſrael, and be­cauſe I will doe theſe things unto thee, prepare thy ſelfe to meet thy God O Iſrael: even that God who is ſaid, Amos 5.8. to turn the ſhadow of death into the mor­ning; all which put her on ſtrong­ly unto the matter of endevour, ſeeing as it is, Micah. 4.12. None know the thoughts of the Lord, nei­ther underſtand they his counſell: ſo that their being a poſſibility for ought ſhee could know to uſe the meanes as ſhe was able; there was an abſolute neceſſity for her to ſubmit her ſelfe unto the meanes.

Theſe and the like things thus deliverd, did much amaze her ſpirit to have beene thus farre deluded and miſtaken in her own Caſe, and wherein ſhee was ſo ſetled, reſolute and confident; unto all61 which ſhee at length made this Reply,Her con­vinced anſwer. That now ſhe was convinced and did certainly believe, that none but God knew things that were to come; that ſhee had erred in judgement in ſo thinking of her ſelfe: That the deſperate Caſe and eſtate ſhee was in had cauſed her to make ſuch concluſions againſt her ſelfe: That now ſhee believed the Devill had no knowledge of Gods Decrees, concerning the everlaſting eſtate of the creature, no more then pleaſed God to reveale unto him: That ſhe was contented to do what ſhee could in uſing of the meanes, if ſhee might bee aſſured to reape any benefit thereby: But that the accidentall indiſpoſition both of her body and minde were ſuch, as ſhee in this Caſe could doe nothing to help her ſelfe, no more then a ſtark dead creature could; and therefore,62 that God muſt doe all; in which Caſe, if hee were ſo pleaſed to give unto her ſtrength and grace to work, then ſhee would, otherwiſe ſhe could doe nothing: a ſore temp­tation, which even untill her laſt ſhe could hardly ſhake off.

Anſw. Hereupon he Replyed, that God as was ſaid, wrought by meanes, and that ſhee was bound to read the Word di­ligently, to pray, heare the ſame, meditate and conferre thereof: That this was Gods way and ap­pointed meanes, to make even ſuch dead creatures live, as ſhee preten­ded her ſelfe to be as it is Ioh. 5. That the time then was, and was a comming, when the dead ſhould heare the voyce of the Son of God, and thoſe who heard his voice ſhould live: Wherefore, ſeeing that their was ſuch a mervellous63 efficacy in hearing of the Word and uſe of meanes, (Wherein the power of the Spirit, did co-operate to make the ſame effectuall) There was an abſolute neceſſity to uſe the meanes for the attaining of ſalvation, or elſe one were thus guilty of their owne damnation in wilfull rejecting and refuſing of the meanes: Unto all which, her anſwer was,Her fur­ther an­ſwers. That ſhee had no power ſo to doe, but when that God would enable her, then ſhee would: Yet hee prayd her, to read the Word and pray as ſhee could and the like, which ſhee refuſed, al­leadging that ſhe could not pray; and for reading of the Word, to what purpoſe were that, ſo to read her own damnation, or to heare judgements and arraignments a­gainſt her ſelfe; that ſhee was better as ſhee was; and therefore64 prayd him to urge her no more in this kinde, untill God were pleaſed to work ſomewhat in her, with abilities ſo to doe, which (if hee had a purpoſe to ſave her) hee would ſurely doe.

Shee is brought off and from the third grand tempta­tion.But for his paines and for his conviction of her judgement, rectifying of her from thoſe fore-mentioned errors ſhee gave him thanks, promiſing no more to torment her ſelfe with cogitati­ons of them; for ſhe was ſatisfied in the Sinne againſt the Holy Ghoſt, in the matter of the Decree; and in Satan or her ignorance of any things to come, his know­ledge to be none at all: But that for the preſent, here ſhee muſt reſt, no further ſhee could poſsibly goe, wiſhing him to ſhare himſelfe from being any more vexed with her untowardneſſe


Hee much abaſhed at her pre­sent diſtemper, and reſolute ſhew of ſtoutneſſe and ſtiffeneſſe of Spirit; yet was not diſcouraged, ſeeing he had got ſo much ground of Satan, as to beat her from her former ſtrong holds, hoping in time alſo to performe the reſt, which ſeemed a tough task to effect: becauſe the indiſpoſition and melancholy temper of her body was ſuch as hindered much the works, ſhee therewith being averſe unto Phyſick. Therefore,Diſcre­tion not to preſſe too much at once. he reſolved for that time, to depart home and preſſe no more upon her at that time, but give her time to ruminate and think upon thoſe things deli­vered, hoping to finde her in a better tune at his return, and ſo accordingly giving charge to watch her diligently, in a milde and loving way, after he had given66 her many and good Exhortations to uſe the means & to have a good conceit of God, he departed, be­cauſe at this time hee would not tyre or overload her, or more new toyle out himſelfe.

Satan is not idle, a new ſtorme ariſes.A little after his departure ſhe began then to bee ſomewhat in the old poſture of frowardneſſe and diſtemper, uttering many times deſperate ſpeeches and hopeleſſe, ſtill refuſing all meanes; ſaying, that all were but in vaine: And was ſo farre gone this way, That the great ſnow, and all the diſaſtrous direfull events hapning abroad anywhere, ſhee ſaid were all long of her, and for her ſake, ſhe guilty of them, and that things would never bee better ſo long as ſhee were alive: For then indeed Santan taking advantage of her melancholy temper, wrought her67 much woe thereby, making her thus over-charge and accuſe her ſelfe, and endeavoring to have brought her back againe unto her former errors: So that now much adoe there was with her, to ſtay, ſupport, or allay that ac­cidentall fierceneſſe, which now thoſe new diſtractions brought upon her; which bred much griefe unto her Husband, Parents and Friends, but was not ſo to be wondered at, that Satan ſhould cauſe unto her or them ſo much diſquietneſſe by his inceſſant new tentations, ſteering his time in Mr Dods abſence, to regaine his diſpoſſeſſed hold, or drive her unto finall deſperation.

In, or neere this interim ſhee was viſited by divers worthy Mi­niſters about the Town, amongſt whom was that famous worthy68 man, Dr uſher, ſince Primate of Ire­land, a magzine of all knowledge and learning, a powerfull plaine Preacher, none like him in ſetting forth Chriſt in his high perfecti­ons and ſurmounting excellencies, and in pointing the right ſtraight next way unto him; and withall as a very wiſe ſtout man, ſo the mildeſt humbleſt and meekeſt man alive, of his infinite reading, knowledge, and parts: This wor­thy man many times did viſite her, would intreat, perſwade, open Chriſt unto her, magnified the ri­ches of Gods mercy that way ex­tended unto the ſonnes of men; ſhewing the freeneſſe of the gift of God this way, and that none were debarred, who did not wilfully ex­clude themſelves, with much meek­neſſe and mildneſſe endeavoring to winne her ſpirit unto a reall69 embracing of thoſe tenders of grace made unto her in the uſe of meanes; whom ſhee willing­ly heard, delighted to hear ſpeak; but withall ſtill kept within the road of her old bias,Her an­ſwer un­to him. her inability to performe holy duties or endeavor that way; that all theſe were ex­cellent things he ſpoke of touching Chriſt, for them unto whom they belonged, but ſhe had no ſhare there­in for for ought ſhee knew ſhee ſaid: but yet uſed ſhee him alwayes with much love, reverence and reſpect, in whatſoever temper ſhee was in, endeavouring ſtill to give him all content and reſpect; and he being wiſe and judicious, ſeeing the temper of her ſpirit, a great work to bee wrought, the iſſue whereof time muſt ſhew, to bee effected by degrees, did not much preſſe upon her ſpirit, or much70 urge her unto any thing, being contented when he came to her to drop upon her many ſweet diſtilling ſhowers of precious ſpeeches; leaving them to work after he were gone.

And now alſo about this time,Her ex­counter with Mr Forbs. came to viſite her another wor­thy Miniſter, whom the Relater brought to ſee her and judge of her Caſe; a wiſe, acute, learned, diſcreet man, of great judgement and parts, one Mr Iohn Forbs, Miniſter at Middleborrow for the Merchants. This man having firſt a great while viewed her and ſaid nothing, at length broke ſilence & told her, that he had heard of her trouble and diſcouragements, and therefore had come to tender his ſervice unto her, to try if any thing were within the compaſſe of his power wherein hee were able to71 ſerve here: Shee curteouſly gave him thanks, but withall told him that her Caſe and doome was al­ready determined and paſt, and therefore there was no good to bee done by any one unto her: Yet ſee­ing him ſo an acute ſharp quick witty man, ſhee was pleaſed to have a ſtrong bout of diſcourſe with him alone, walking at her houſe in Eſher Gallery, where ha­ving toughly diſputed with her a long time and no good to be done, but thwarted with many ſtrong uncouth objections and Scrip­tures, ſophiſtically applyed by her, beyond the skill or ſtrength of her own ſpirit or wit as hee judged, he confeſſed ſhe was too hard now on a ſudden for him. So at one bout having the better of her in a diſcourſe of Faith, he broke off laughing, with a jeſt, cal­led72 her Husband near by an ſaid, Sir, now I can ſtay no longer, but I will ſtudy how to anſwer you Wives Arguments, and will now leave her in a good eſtate: (In faith, profeſsing infidelity,) who having taken his leave and depar­ted: The Relator enquired what his judgement was of her and her Caſe? Who made this an­ſwer, That it was the ſtrangeſt that ever hee had ſeen, heard or read ofA ſtrange preſaging Cenſure. That the Lord had ſome ſtrange work to doe by her, but whether in mercy or judgement hee could not determine: no more hee would come to viſite her, nor could be drawn unto it.

Upon this her late diſtemper and untowardneſſe, the good old man Mr Dod being againe ſent for and come, was notwithſtanding entertained by her in ſhew loving­ly,73 yet with a ſad louring coun­tenance by and by accompanied therewith, as though hee had not been welcome; which he in his uſuall chearfull manner not regar­ding, uſing her with all meekneſſe and love, which he found gained much upon her ſpirit; after which having diſcourſed, & two or three dayes prayed with her, and for her, ſhee began to mend, but yet could not be perſwaded to read, pray by her ſelfe, or goe to Chruch; wherefore hee thought it expedi­ent to leave urging thereof, untill her judgement were convinced therein: which was the next work to be done, a tough taske to effect, and which ſhee ſtrongly oppoſed and withſtood by one maine Ar­gument (being beaten off from all her other ſhifts) which was this out of Rom. 14. ult.


Object. Whatſoever is not of Faith is ſinne; but ſhee did not be­lieve, nor could doe any thing in faith, therefore all her actions muſt needs be ſinfull; ſo aggravating her condemnation, ſhee having ſinnes therefore enough to condemne her, would no more this way encreaſe their number already too many.

Anſw. 1This Argument hee judged to be Sophiſticall, ſubtile, and a ſtrong fetch of the Devill, for his ultimum vale, and laſt re­fuge; whereunto hee after a little pauſe, thus Replyed, That he deny­ed the aſſumption, that ſhe could not doe anything in faith; for, the degrees of faith muſt be conſidered: There was a degree of initiation of babes in Chriſt, and of ſtrong men in Chriſt: That ſhe muſt now be conſidered of in the lower from of the ſchoole amongſt the babes in Chriſt,75 needing milk not ſtrong meat (as the Apoſtle ſpeaks) and there­fore, though things were not done in a ſtrong, yet they might bee done in a weak and true faith, which might have a true and ſu­table reward: So that there be­ing in the World many and large promiſes made unto the reading and hearing of the Word (ſome whereof wee then repeated) now for brevity omitted: That duties done in obedience unto the command of God, were then ſo done in faith, becauſe according to and with a reſpect unto the commandement; and muſt needs becauſe of the truth of God who cannot lie nor deny himſelfe, be rewarded. And put the caſe (which he then denyed) that ſhee muſt eternally periſh, yet God hath many out­ward mercies and bleſsings in ſtore,76 wherewith to reward ſuch outward obedience, many times farre be­yond our ſlight performances, free­dome from many temporall judge­ments, leſſening, delay, and mitiga­tion of them, in number, weight, meaſure and continuance, remove-all of them and the like, in his beſt time: So that all things conſide­red, the beſt for her were to ſub­mit her ſelfe unto the will of God, lie down Saint-like at his feet: uſe the meanes, truſt, waite upon him, and then to let the Lord as (Ioab ſaid to Abner) doe that which ſeemeth beſt in his eyes.

Anſw. 2And for that other cavill of the encreaſe of her ſins, in the matter of her endeavours; for this he told her, That all her good actions done, ſhould be upon record, & all her ſins ſhould be forgiven and done away, ſo that this ſhould not hinder her obedi­ent walking.


Object. Unto this ſhee objected her inability to performe any holy duty, and therefore ſeeing God in the up-ſhot of all his free pro­miſes declares himſelfe thus (Yet for all theſe things, will I be ſought unto of the Houſe of Iſrael) ſhe not being able to aske or make obedient endeavour to wrap her ſelfe up within the promiſe, ſo as to have intereſt, or challenge the ſame, that therefore it were in vaine for her to uſe any meanes.

Anſ. Reply hereunto was made, That true it was, that this was the ordinary roade of Providence in deſpenſing of ſalvation, to ſue and challenge the promiſes for our owne comfort, and to diſpence ſalvation in the uſe of meanes: Yet that God being a free agent to give and work at his good plea­ſure, had not ſo tyed himſelfe unto78 any methode ſo in his working, but that at his pleaſure he might deſpence therewith: And that therefore for her inability and weakneſſe, God could at his good time ſtrengthen her to his work, ſo in the meane time, that ſhee did her beſt endea­vor according unto her ability, not being this way wanting; for where much weakneſſe was, yet God ma­ny times helpt and took in good part our weak performances, and that weakneſſe with truth and doing to our power went farre in Gods ac­ceptance: he loving us not for any thing in us, but freely for what he works in us; as that Hoſ. 14.4. I will heale their back-ſlidings, I will love them freely, &c. And that Revel. 3.8. Vnto the Church of Philadelphia, Thou haſt a little ſtrength and haſt kept my word. So was ſhewed unto her that of the79 Diſciples, Ioh. 17.8. being weak ignorant men in many things touching ſalvation, for whom Chriſt yet pleads with his Father, They have kept my word, though formerly they were not able to beare thoſe things might other­wiſe have been revealed unto them, Ioh. 16.12. Therefore from hence was much preſſed upon her the uſe of meanes howſoever unto her weak power and ſtrength, which God would encreaſe unto a greater growth, being that he gi­veth ſtrength to the weak, and un­to them that have no ſtrength, Iſa. 40.29. Her Caſe was ſhewed her to be no worſe then that Ezek. 16.4.5. of the people of Iſrael pol­luted in their own bloud, caſt forth in a miſerable condition, no eye pitying of them, any way to help them; whom yet God in his mercy80 pitied in that wofull condition, ſaying unto them, That even then they ſhould live, they ſhould live, when they were thus in their bloud, Ezek. 16.6. Therefore to hope well in the mercies of the Almigh­ty, not meaſuring the ſame by the ſcantling of her ſhallow conceits of God, in whoſe ſight all the ſinnes of the world are nothing, in compariſon of the infinite price payd of that blood of the everla­ſting Covenant, and infinite value and merit of the ſame, which ſpeaks better things then the blood of Abel, Heb. 12.24. and whereby we have acceſſe with boldneſſe un­to the Throne of Grace, by a new and living way which hee hath conſecrated for us through theeie, that is to ſay his fleſh.

The ſtrength of theſe things thus enforced, ſo overcame her81 thus delivered, that herein ſhe was alſo convinced, that ſhee ought to uſe the meanes to her power, truſt and waite upon God for the iſſue, being contented of his good plea­ſure whatſoever, and therefore re­ſolved and promiſed, that now ſhe would goe to Church,Shee is brought to goe to Church. uſe the meanes and try what Gods plea­ſure were in time to doe with her; conceiving now ſome ſmall hope that poſſibly ſhee might bee ſaved in the uſe of meanes: and ſo was perſwaded to goe to Church; at her firſt going, being brought to heare Dr Gibſon; who know­ing of her comming, applyed him­ſelfe covertly for her occaſions, yet not ſo, but ſhe ſuſpected that he had beene prompted, and had ſpoken things of purpoſe for her caſe (which ſhee murmured at) but was paſſed over; for indeed82 the burthen wherewith ſhee had over-loaded her ſelfe was ſo great, that we durſt never adde any thing thereunto, but fed her with all en­couragements, ſhe being too apt to over-charge her ſelfe, and to de­ſpaire upon any addition of fewell unto that fire which already was kindled in her: And ſo whereſo­ever ſhee went to heare, notice was ſtill given, ſo to mannage their buſineſſe, that hee might know they had at that time a hearer thus qualified before them, whereby ſhee received no diſcou­ragement in hearing of the Word; but by the contrary matter of en­couragement, her ſpirit being ſtill jealous that all things were prompted for her ſake (hea­ring no more terrible things) as indeed they were.

Yet in this interim, things being83 not yet well ſetled within her, not daring to truſt her alone, it was thought fit in the next place to fetch off her endeavours from her own deſtruction, which by Gods mercy was thus effected:How ſhee was brought from at­tempting againſt her ſelfe. One day being in a very good humor, mer­ry and well pleaſed, Mr Dod prayd her that ſhe would reſolve him tru­ly of one Queſtion, which hee would demand of her, which ſhe faithfully promiſed to doe. Then he demanded of her, That if now ſhee were condemned to be burnt, or hanged, drawn and tortured, to bee firſt rackt, ſcourged and ma­ny times whipt and tortured, Whe­ther or no ſhee would not eſteeme it to be a high favour and promotion, to be reprived and reſpited for ten or twenty yeares or thereabouts, to live longer? Which ſhee affirmed ſhee would take in this caſe for a84 very high favour (not perceiving his ſcope and drift in the Queſti­on;) Then ſaid he, tell me (taking her lovingly by the hand and ſmi­ling,) Why then did you all this while paſt make ſuch haſte to have poſted away unto Hell fire for ever, the torments and miſery whereof are many thouſand times in violence be­yond all the poſsible torments of this world, ſeeing it is uncertaine whether ever you ſhall goe thither or not, but that God in the uſe of meanes will ſoften your heart and ſave you? But ſeeing the time (if ever) will be too ſoone whenſoever: therefore it were madneſſe and ex­treame folly in you, to fall into that courſe which might precipitate and caſt you there preſently before the time; but to live forth natures courſe, trying what end the Lord will make: Shee being by her85 own confeſſion in ſome ſort catcht now as David was by Nathan the Prophet, now perceiving the drift of this ſurprize, took him by the hand, and prayd him, That in that kinde no more jealouſie or ſuſpi­tion might be had, for now ſhee was ſo by him convinced, that ſhee was reſolved to live ſo long as God would permit her, and that ſhee now was very ſenſible of his diſcourſe of Hell, and what ſmall reaſon ſhee had to make haſte thither.

Having thus by Gods mercy brought her to ſubmit her ſelfe unto the meanes,Shee is convin­ced, that ſhe ought & might receive the Sa­crament. and hearing of Word, wherein faith and ſalvati­on are uſually conveyed and wrought; there wanting yet one thing, to bring her unto the Sa­crament (unto which ſhe was very averſe:) The next thing this good man went about, was how to com­paſſe86 this, and convince her judge­ment that ſhee ought, might and muſt participate herein, as well as in hearing of the Word: This was by her thought a very ſtrang thing to doe, that ſuch a one as ſhe ima­gined her ſelfe to be, ſhould dare to Communicate. But hereof hee aſſured her the truth, from the equity and neceſſity of that com­mand of God where all the Males in Iſrael were commanded to appeare three times a yeare before the Lord at Jeruſalem to eat of the Paſſeover; in which caſe whoſo­ever refuſed to come, or deſpiſed the ſame; hee was to bee cut off from his people: Whence he infer­red this concluſion, that whatſoe­ver our worthineſſe or unworthi­neſſe in that caſe were, yet the command of God muſt be obeyed; all were bound to come and eat87 of the Paſſeover: And therefore that all within the Pales of the Church, ought to Communicate and receive the Sacrament howſoever qualified: In which caſe unworthy receiving ſhould not damne them, if once in all their life time they ſhould or did receive worthily: Shewing that in Hezekiahs time, many then had received the Paſſeover unwor­thily, for whom notwithſtanding hee prayed the good Lord to for­give them, though they had not eaten according unto the prepara­tion of the ſanctuary. Beſides this he ſhewed her, That the Sacrament was not a comforting, ſtrengthning, building up Ordinance onely, but alſo a converting and healing power being therein for help of the ſick and diſeaſed, a reviving quick­ning Ordinance alſo; ſo as all ought to participate of the ſame.


Object. Hereunto ſhe objected that out of 1 Cor. 11.29. That un­worthy Receivers did eat and drink their own damnation, and there­fore ſhe durſt not adventure any more to aggravate her condemna­tion and puniſhments.

Anſw. Unto this he Replyed, That ſhe was miſtaken in the mea­ning of the words, for the word Damnation muſt not there be taken in the terrible ſenſe, the Origi­nall not carrying it ſo, but thus, (ſuch eat Iugdement) unto them­ſelves, viz. temporall puniſhments: which the enſuing verſe 30. cor­rects the ſame thus, For this cauſe many are weak and ſickly among you, and many ſleep, &c. Which ſhewes the meaning onely is, that ſuch endure ſometimes temporall puniſhments; who yet may bee ſaved and goe to Heaven. So that89 ſtill the generall holds in equity, as in and under the Law; that Gods Ordinance in the Sacrament is not to bee neglected of us for our unſufficiency and unfitneſſe for the ſame, no more then un­der the Law during the Paſſeover; becauſe, it may be a meanes to fit,Let the ſcrupu­lous note this well. heale, cure, ſtrengthen, revive, quicken and enable us to be worthy Receivers: For we come not to bring vertue unto the Sacrament, but to receive vertue, life, ſtrength and quickning from thence: And that howſoever in this caſe we be qua­lified, it were beſt to be obedient and uſe the meanes, all which with much more the Relator remem­bers not, was ſet on with more excellent illuſtrations, exhortati­ons and pithy remonſtrances: which diſcourſe being finiſhed ſhe became in this alſo convinced in90 judgement, that ſhee promiſed him thus farre to ſubmit herſelfe yet further unto the meanes, that ſhee would now alſo goe unto the Sacrament: Onely in this Caſe ſhe begg'd exemption not to be urged, be­cauſe ſhee could not neither was able by her ſelfe to performe any private duties of prayer, or read­ing of the Word conſtantly: where­unto, becauſe they would not o­ver drive her, put her beyond her ſtrength, or moleſt her ſpirit, they ſpared to urge her, contented with what they could with gentle­neſſe and entreaty perſwade her unto.

A very ſtrange experi­ence and wonder­full.Yet it is moſt ſtrange to heare, how the Lord dealt with her in one thing, wherein ſhe delighted, and was hardly broken off, viz. Shee had a cuſtome in tumbling over of the Bible, to put her finger91 ſuddenly upon ſome one verſe as it hit; ſaying, now whatſoever my finger is upon, is juſt my Caſe, whatſoever it bee, and my doome: But ſo the Lord directed all her fingers ſo put, that looking upon the verſe, ſtill it was found en­couraging and comfortable, not diſcouraging: whereupon being much prayed and entreated, ſee­ing hitherto ſhee had found all places to ſpeak for her, that ſhee would deſiſt, and not any more thus tempt God; who prayd that ſhee might doe but once more ſo (it being in the preſence of many) promiſing faithfully that af­ter that one time, ſhe would never do ſo any more, to attempt any ſuch tryall: Whereupon at length all adventured to ſuffer her once more to ſee what Gods provi­dence would prove in ſo ſtrange92 a Caſe. But withall if ſome croſſe place came, they prayed her not to bee diſcouraged; whereupon ſhee ſuddenly opened the Book, about the middle thereof, in the Propheſie of Iſaiah, and without looking or reading a word, or knowing what ſhee did, ſhe put her finger upon that excellent verſ. Iſa. 40.27. Why ſayeſt thou O Jacob, and ſpeakeſt O Iſrael, my way is hid from the Lord? haſt thou not known, haſt thou not heard that the everlaſting God the Crea­tor of the ends of the Earth, faint­eth not, neither is weary; there is no ſearching of his underſtanding: hee giveth power to the faint, and to them that have no might he en­creaſeth ſtrength; even the youths ſhall faint and be weary, and the young men ſhall utterly fall; But they that wait upon the Lord, ſhall93 renew their ſtrength, they ſhall mount up with wings as Eagles, and they ſhall walk and not faint: Which place being conſidered of and read, ſo croſſing her hopes and expectation, made her being much abaſhed to bluſh. For there­in ſhee was reproved for her croſſe conceits of God touching her, as neglected of the Almighty; and for all her weakneſſe and imperfections was ſhewed, that God could help all, who with a word made heaven and earth, en­abling her to doe all duties at his good pleaſure; being there­with encouraged to wait and de­pend upon God in the uſe of meanes by ſuch an excellent pro­miſe: And ſo was therewith ſhew­ed how good God was unto her, every way ſhewing love, notwith­ſtanding her untowardneſſe, and94 tempting of him by ſuch ſignes: At which, not knowing what to ſay, ſhee flung off poorely, ſaying,Object. this was promiſed to Iacob and Iſrael; It was nothing unto her and her Caſe:Anſw. Whereunto anſwer was made out of that place, Rom. 15. Whatſoever was written before hand, was written for our learning, that wee through patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope; and ſo was thereby vanquiſhed in judgement, that ſhe promiſed now to be ſatisfied, and never any more to make any ſuch tryall, but to offer her ſelfe unto the uſe of meanes, and to wait the Lords leiſure what hee pleaſed to doe with her: Yet ſtill alleadging the impotency in her, that ſhe was able to doe nothing herein to­wards this great work, but that God muſt doe all, when being95 enabled, ſhee would doe that whereunto ſhe ſhould be ſtrength­ned.

Shee is perſwa­ded to joyne in ſinging of ſome ſort of Pſalms.Yet wanted there one thing more, to gether to joyn in ſinging of Pſalmes, which with much adoe ſhee was brought unto, alleadging that her Caſe admitted of no ſuch melody, neither had ſhee cauſe to ſing, but to mourn all her life time: Yet being told that it was a du­ty to ſing prayſes unto God, for all his mervellous mercies, power and goodneſſe, as well as to joyn in hearing of the Word; and that thanksgiving being the everlaſting work of Heaven in continuall pray­ſing of God, was a work could not be too ſoone begun upon earth; and that the Pſalmes being of divers compoſitions and poſtures; of thankſgiving, petition, gratulati­on, complaint, and deprecation,96 ſhee might joyne in ſome, many of which might fit her Caſe; ſhee was contented to joyn in Pſalmes of complaint, petition, mourn­ing and deprecation, but in no other of any acknowledgement of any mercy received: For ſaid ſhe, If I be onely reſerved as a ſtalled Oxe unto the ſlaughter, what cauſe have I to give thanks; and if I be not to goe to Heaven, what have I to doe with the work of Heaven before the time, or having ſome work wrought in me, whereby I may be aſſured of my intereſt therein?

Why ſhee would have li­ved un­der a powerful Mini­ſtry.About this time willingly ſhee would have live under ſome powerful Miniſtry, hoping, that thereby ſome ſuch work might be wrought upon her, as might ena­ble her to performe duties; and for this cauſe ſecretly made the Relator goe into Eſſex to try whe­ther97 or not that worthy powerfull late thundering Preacher, Mr Ro­gers of Dedham, would have en­tertained her at his houſe, who willingly granted the ſame: But when the buſineſſe was moved un­to her Father and Mother, nei­ther they nor her Husband would conſent unto the ſame, though Mr Dod, and Mr Culver­vell both affected to have gone with her, ſo too indulgent were they over her; which refuſall much unhookt her ſpirit, and had almoſt put her in her former Caſe againe, ſo much did it afflict her; but not remedy,An ex­erience of her ſp••••,〈…〉her. at length ſhee con­formed her ſelfe unto neceſſity.

I should much tranſgreſſe, and wrong this diſcourſe of Gods mercies into this good creature, if I ſhould omit any paſſage of Satans ſubtelties and attempts98 againſt her, how farre they pre­vailed; for ſo, the Power and good­neſſe of God unto her in ſaving her at length, will ſo much the more evidently appeare to his glo­ry: Therefore this enſuing paſ­ſage I relate, as the furtheſt ex­tent of Satans malice: One day as ſhee was walking in her garden at Waltham upon Thames with the Relator and another friend (for Eſher that place where her trouble firſt began, ſhee never after could endure) ſuddenly ſhee ſtopt and fixed her eyes faſt upon the ground, ſtaring upon it with ſtrange wilde looks, for halfe a quater of an hour, from which we could hardly divert her, but at laſt did, though ſhee ſeemed much troubled to be interrupted; and then (as her cuſtome was when the waters of her ſpirits and thoughts99 were become muddy) ſhe began to ſeem to caſt off all means again; ſaying, That her heart was ſo heard, as it could never bee ſoftned; this was by thoſe with her then much op­poſed and denyed as faſt as ſhe affir­med the ſame, enforcing that God who with a Word made Heaven and Earth could ſoften it; wher­unto ſhee in anger replyed, (why then God cannot ſoften my heart) at hearing of this blaſphemous ſpeech, ſpoken in the heigth of temptation, the Relator without ſpeaking one word unto her ſud­denly left her; for ſuch ſpeeches were not to be born with, countenan­ced, or diſputed with, but to be caſt off, with deteſtation and abomina­tion, for (contra principiis non eſt diſputandum) they ſay: A lit­tle while after, ſhee being then ready to ride abroad and goe to100 her houſe at Eſher to take the aire, going to take horſe, ſhee de­manded of the Relator, whether hee would not ride abroad with her, whereunto hee replyed, No, he durſt not goe in her company, who did ſo lately blaſpheme, for feare the ground would open and ſwallow them up; but that ſeeing under the Law the blaſpemer was to die the death; that he would go to the Arch­biſhop and complaine of her, beare witneſſe againſt her, and provide faggots to burn her; wherewith we both parted in ſeeming diſcon­rent. She being gone, the Relator ere his way-going, went to her waiting-woman, and left his re­membrance unto her, which when her woman, at her return told her; ſhee would not believe that hee had ſo done, but asked her Maide, what farwell didſt thou think hee101 gave me, That he would goe com­plaine of me, and provide faggots to burne me: To which her Maide anſwered, Then Miſtriſſe, you have ſpoken ſome ſtrange untoward things; I think I did ſo, ſaid ſhee: In this interim the Relator ſent and wrote very kindly to her in his abſence, and after a Moneths time returned againe unto her; when,Confeſ­ſion. ſhee prayed him to ſtay no more ſo long away, gave him thanks for his harſh uſage of her; ſaying, ſhee had deſerved worſe, and would never ſo doe any more; Telling al­ſo that then when formerly ſhe had ſtood ſtaring on the ground, ſhe was then aſſaulted with fierce and ſtrong temptations; all the while a brick-making for the Devill; and prayd him when he ſaw her do ſo any more, to put her out of that poſture, and not to ſpare her, how angry ſoever102 ſhee ſhould for the time bee.

Now as ſhee was in a ſeeming good tune and poſture of en­deavour to uſe the meanes,A new ſtorme. in tumbling over the Bible, ſhe en­countred with that terrible place, Heb. 6. enferred upon the ſinne againſt the Holy Ghoſt, That the ground which was often watered, and brings forth nothing but briers and thorns, was neare unto cur­ſing and burning, &c. Object. Which place for a few dayes put her quite off hooks againe, affirming that ſhee was juſt ſo, a creature that brought forth nothing but briers and thorns, though ſhe had been often watered from heaven in the uſe of means, and there­fore that ſhe was neere unto cur­ſing and burning.

Anſw. 1Firſt, This was deneyd unto her, that ſhee had ever lived under103 any ſuch powerful Miniſtry, as to have been often thus watered.

Secondly, That ſhee neither hi­therto had beene ſo bad, as to bring forth nothing but briers and thorns, having to their know­ledge brought forth and produ­ced much good fruit of her hea­ring in times paſt, though now ſhee were for a ſeaſon over-cloud­ed with temptations, ſo, as ſhee could not diſcerne of her own eſtate, nor was apt to judge thereof.

Thirdly, That this place being enforced as a reaſon of the ſinne againſt the Holy Ghoſt, againſt their enlightning; which by her own confeſsion, was a pitch above her, that hitherto ſhee never had at­tained unto; therefore ſhe needed not to make any ſuch rigid ap­plication, or conſtruction of the104 place againſt her ſelfe; wherewith, and the like milde ſpeeches unto her to this effect, ſhee was at length pacified as before.

The jour­ney paſt recoun­ted.Good Reader be not weary, I will now ſuddenly make way unto a concluſion, for much of our work, and the greateſt part is done and hardeſt to compaſſe; Lo now, we have brought this good woman thus farre: To aske the way (in ſome ſort like one of Je­remies Converts) to Zion with her face thitherwards. She is brought out of the houſe of bondage, from he brick-making ſlavery, Pharaoh purſues as it were ſtill after her, but hath not over­taken her, ſhee is driven to flie and wander up and downe the wilderneſſe, now backwards now forwards, as the Church in the wilderneſſe was, ere ſhe can arrive105 at her heavenly Canaan; and I hope wee ſhall ere long ſee her Iordan ſtand up, and give her a faire paſſage in thither, though ſhee hath beene well buffeted by the way.

Firſt, Shee hath been now con­vinced, not to have ſinned that ſin againſt the Holy Ghoſt (as Satan perſwaded her) being in this ſettled.

Secondly, Shee hath been per­ſwaded in that grand buſineſſe of the Decree of God, not to meddle therewith, and that no Creature, Devill, Man or Angel, ſave God himſelfe had any knowledge there­of.

Thirdly, In the matter of en­deavor, ſhe hath been convinced, that ſhee ought and muſt ſet her ſelfe in what poſsibly ſhee could, to uſe the meanes, wait therein, and106 to truſt God with the iſſue of all.

Fourthly, Shee hath been per­ſwaded to live as long as poſsibly ſhee could, not to be a means of her own deſtruction.

Fifthly, Shee hath been perſwa­ded of the lawfulneſſe and neceſ­ſity of her communicating, not­withſtanding all her ſeeming a­verſneſſe, and indiſpoſition there­unto.

Sixthly, Shee hath been brought from that courſe in tempting God by putting her finger ſuddenly upon places of Scripture, to try her ſtare, all which fell out con­trary unto her expectation, good ſtill.

Seventhly, How and on what conditions ſhee was brought to joyne in ſinging of Pſalmes: all which being paſt, one would think, that now there had not107 been much adoe, but to have had a quick end of her troubles, and ſufferings.

But the Lord wonderfull in working, and excellent infinitely in counſell and wiſdome, had o­therwiſe ſo appointed the ſame, that ſhee ſhould yet a few years longer be ſtorm beaten and ſick, and wander as it were in a wil­derneſſe, ere ſhee arrived at her heavenly Canaan: And therefore out of her habituall impotencie ſeeing ſhee was ſo ſtiffe and ſlow to work out her own ſalvation or take paines for it, Shee had at length her deſire, though hee made it coſt her deare ere hee at length revealed himſelf unto her: And therefore heareat ſhee ſtuck ſtill even to the laſt, expecting what extraodinary work God would work in her, to enable her to108 take paines for her ſalvation: A ſtrange temptation, which all her life time could hardly ever bee quite removed: Untill God in a ſtrange and unuſuall manner, for matter of feeling revealed himſelfe unto her in ſuch a meaſure, as mortality was incapable of, to the over-comming of her ſpirits (who lived not long after) to be in its place related.

About this time that famous worthy man of God, Mr Robert Bruce ſome time Miniſter of E­denborrow, then in priſon amongſt the wilde Iriſh, for not preaching or aſſenting unto the truth of the Earle of Gowries Treaſon, hear­ing by the Relator the trouble and true ſtate of this Gentlewomans Caſe, with the progreſſe thereof, and how ſhee had been brought to reveale the Devils counſell,109 wrote a letter unto the Relator touching his cenſure of her Caſe, and hopefull iſſue thereof: who being for afflicted conſciences one of ten thouſand (he himſelfe ha­ving beene for twenty yeares in terrors of conſcience, ere he was forced to ſettle unto the Miniſtry) gave a judicious propheticall cenſure of the event of her caſe, as in ſome ſort it fell out (too long here to inſert) but in conclu­ſion with this upſhot: That now ſhee had bewrayed ſo freely the Devils counſell, hee knew that all would ſhortly bee well are long, and that her trouble would have to admiration a ſtrange event; and that for her finall eſtate, he thank­ed God, he made no more doubt thereof then of his own, which he aſſured himſelfe of, becauſe God had given him ſo large a heart to110 continue inſtant for her in prayer with a great deale of comfort; concluding his letter with a pa­theticall ſpeech turned in behalfe of the Gentlewoman towards Satan, worthy to be written in letters of gold, which being ſo rare and unuſuall in the Preſſe ſpeeches of this nature, I have therefore adventured here to en­ſert.

A Speech to Satan.

O Enemy Satan, although thy enmity for the preſent be troubleſome unto this patient, yet I thank my God through Je­ſus Chriſt, that thou art an ene­my unto her; and that he hath put her in his Camp to fight a­gainſt thee. When I conſider how in Paradice the Lord pro­claimed111 irreconciliable enmity betwixt thee and the bleſſed ſeed, I account her happy in that thou art her enemy, and that ſtrength is given her to fight againſt thee, for hereby I perceive that ſhee is none of thine, but ſtands on that ſide whereof Chriſt is the Captaine, and all the Saints are Souldiers; where the victory undoubtedly muſt bee both ſure and certaine on her ſide. O deceitfull Serpent! If we finde ſuch terrors and en­ſignes of thy fury for theſe ſmaller ſinnes of frailty which we fooliſhly by thy enticement com­mit; what ſhould we have found if wee had followed thee, in the reſt of thy deadly aſſiduall and unmeaſurable fiery injected temptations? from the which the Lords preventing and reſtraining112 mercy hath kept us. I have often by experience heard that thou art a faithleſſe traytor; becauſe thou tempteſt a man to ſinne, and for the ſelfe-ſame ſinne which by thy inſtigation we commit, thou art the firſt accuſer, and the laſt tor­menter. The Lord encreaſe our faith, and confirme his good pur­poſe in our hearts, that we never hearken any more to thy lying words, nor ſuffer our ſoules to be circumvented by thee and thy deceitfull ſnares. And as for the work of her ſalvation, ſince it is a work which our God will work in ſpite of thee; wherefore ſhould ſhee or wee any more regard thy lying teſtimony? Thou didſt moſt malitiouſly put the queſti­on unto our Saviour, whether or no he were the Son of God? And then what marvell is it that113 thou dareſt ſay unto his children that they are none of his? Is there any ſuch undoubted truth that thou dareſt not deny? or any falſhood which thou dareſt not make good and juſtifie? Why therefore ſhould we enter in diſ­puting with thee? for, her ſalva­tion conſiſts not either in thy queſtioning, or in her diſputing againſt it; but upon the Lords unchangeable Decree of Electi­on. If thou ſhouldeſt ſpeak for her, and plead her cauſe, ſhe were ſo much the worſe, and nothing the better; and now that thou pleadſt againſt her, ſhe is nothing the worſe. I love no teſtimony which proceeds from thee. When thou confeſſedſt that Jeſus was the Son of God, he rebuked thee, and would none of thy teſtimony; and when thou cryedſt out that114 Paul and Sylas were the ſervants of the moſt High God, although thou ſpakeſt the truth, yet they would not accept of thy teſtimo­nie. So although thou wouldeſt affirme that ſhe were the child of God, were ſhe any thing the bet­ter? no, but ſo much the worſe; thou canſt vent no truth but with an intent to deceive: Therefore keep thy teſtimomie to thy ſelfe, ſpeak what thou wilt, thou art ever like thy ſelfe, a liar; curſed art thou, and curſed ſhalt thou be, with all thy Confederates, and curſed are they that are in friend­ſhip with thee: So in concluſion, thy purſuite of her, and her ſafe­ty hitherto from thy power, ſhewes mee that ſhee is none of thine.

The Lord powre in his comfort and grace in her weak heart, that115 ſhee may finde and feele the ſweet­neſſe of the things we write of, and from her feeling to give God the prayſe of his glory, and of her victory, which I am ſure to be moſt certaine in Gods good time, and that her ſalvation is as ſure as mine own, I prayſe God.

By this time three whole years having paſt, ſince Mr Dod began with her, having endured ſo many hot skirmiſhes with Satan, made ſo many long journeys, being toyld out in body and ſpirit, and deſi­rous now to reſt awhile, having fa­cilitated his tough task, and fitted it for ſome other to finiſh and build her up further, hee having in all things convicted her judge­ment, that God who does all things well, and makes all things Rom. 8.28. work together for good unto his children; who when116 Moſes was old, appointed the young man Ioſhua in his place; and who when Manna failed, brought the people into Canaan flowing with milke and honey, did now alſo out of his good Provi­dence appoint a fit man to ſucceed as a helper in Mr Dods place, meet for that poſture of ſtrength ſhee was now in, In a ſtrange objecting, diſputing way, followed by Satans temptations, and prompted with ſtrong objections againſt her ſelfe: So that now her great want was of an able man to be continually with her, to diſpute conſtantly with all her temptations and ob­jections, able to anſwer and cruſh all.

This and ſuch a Helper did God in his infinite mercy in the next place provide for her. Another fit help ſucceeds to M­ſter Dad.For it plea­ſed God in his wiſe providence, ſo117 to order the matter, that her Huſ­bands Cure at Eſher being a Do­native, and not a Preſentative en­downment was voyde and to bee diſpoſed of: In which interim, notice was given unto him of one Mr Hooker then at Cambridge, now in New-England: A great Schol­lar, an acute Diſputant, a ſtrong learned, a wiſe modeſt man, every way rarely qualified; who being a Non-conformitan in judgement, not willing to trouble himſelfe with Preſentative Livings, was contented and perſwaded by Mr Dod to accept of that poore Living of 40 l. per annum, Mr Drake her Husband being a worthy wel­beloved Gentleman, and able to procure his liberty, and retaine him ſtill in the ſame: This worthy man accepted of the Place, having withall, his dyet and lodging at118 Eſher Mr Drakes houſe; and ſo by this meanes, as to free Mr Dod from his toile and trouble, ſo to be at all aſſayes ready to mannage and work her ſpirit, encounter all her objections, eſpie all Satans windings and turnings, and catch her at all non-plus advantages, being acute, quick, nimble-witted, well skild in knowing and opening of the Scriptures; withall a good Logitian, a ſtrong Diſputant, as he could well doe. And ſo the good old man as occaſion ſerved, ſend­ing and writing unto her, after divers ſad and ſerious diſcourſes with her, wherein ſhee covenanted to obſerve all promiſes paſt, re­taining her former reſolutions in thoſe things wherin in judgement ſhe was convinced, he was for that time lovingly diſmiſſed, and re­warded largely by her Parents.


This man Mr Hooker being a good acute, ſmart Preacher when he liſted, beſides that information Mr Dod had given him, was ſo wiſe, firſt to trie her ſpirit, to finde her diſpoſition, uſing her with much mildneſſe & love, ere he would ad­venture to meddle with her ſpirit, chuſing rather that way made from her might uſher the way unto his diſcourſe, then that at firſt hee ſhould enforce any thing upon her: Which was not long in ſu­ſpence; for now having a fit perſon to rough hew her (as it were) whom ſhee could neither weary out nor over-come in Argument, but was able to diſcerne and catch Satan in all his Sophiſmes, there every way fell out ſtrong diſputes betwixt them: But all within the compaſſe of thoſe former things wherein Mr Dod before had con­vinced120 her: Satan delighting ſtill to raſe new uprores in her, and (as his cuſtome is) not to ſuffer us to be at peace though we be out of danger: Such now were his pra­ctiſes anew, to winde up his old bottomes, and to renew diſputes, even in thoſe things ſhe was con­vinced of. For Mr Hooker being newly come from the Univerſity had a new anſwering methode (though the ſame things) where­with ſhee was mervellouſly de­lighted, and being very covetous of knowledge, was pleaſed with new diſputes and objections to faſten further upon her ſelfe thoſe forementioned things; ſtill fur­ther and further ſifting into the ſame old Truths whereof ſhee was well perſwaded (and as is ſaid) convinced.

Yet could not he ſo evenly hold121 the ballance in mannaging of her ſpirit, but that now and then ſhee would flie out,By de­grees ſhe is ſometimes off hooks ſtill. in many diſtem­pers, wiſhing to leave off all, for ſhee now ſaw that there was no remedy, the meanes did not work nor prove effectuall unto her: To what purpoſe ſhould ſhee any more labour in vaine? But eſpecially towards the Sacrament, then uſua­ally ſhee would be off hooks, ei­ther not comming, or unwilling­ly, if ſhee did: Upon whom this place for her waiting and depend­ing upon God was ſtrongly urged, Hab. 3. ult. That the viſion of Gods deliverances, was for an appointed time, therefore to wait; for though it tarried, yet it ſhould come and not tarry; and that al­ſo of Iſai. 8. I will wait upon the Lord, who hath hid his face from the houſe of Jacob; and I will look for122 him: affirming unto her that theſe and the like hard travels, were in­cident unto Gods beſt beloved people, to have many, hard and long trialls, and yet at length glorious deliverances, as was al­ledged from that place, Amos 3.2. You only have I known of all the Nations of the earth; therefore I will puniſh you for your iniquities: (which God may doe forgiving the ſinne, though bee take ven­geance of their inventions:) And that Heb. 12. what ſonne is there whom the Father chaſteneth not? If therefore yee bee without cor­rection (whereof all are partakers) then are yee baſtards and not ſonnes. Which with the like in­ſinuations from the word cloſely urged, brought down her ſpirit to mildneſſe and meekneſſe: For though her indiſpoſition and123 temptations, made her many times contrary unto her naturall diſ­poſition harſh and untoward, with the habite ſhee had accrewed in time to be croſſe, and try thoſe ſoundly ſhee converſed with; yet this happy endowment ſhee had, to be very rationall according unto her conception, and would be ſet down and ſatisfied with pregnant places of Scripture being ſeaſona­bly preſſ'd and lovingly opened un­to her.

But the matter of repentance much troubled her,Queſt. of repen­tance, diſ­cuſſed that ſhe could not repent; demanding, Whether it were poſſible for her to goe to Heaven without Repentance?

Hereunto was anſwered: Firſt,Sol. I. That God did not tie ſalvation unto any meaſure of repentance; but might at his pleaſure ſave, eſpecially where there were no124 groſſe ſinnes to dam up mercies gates; whereof praiſed bee God ſhee was free.

Secondly, That God exacted no more of his creatures then he gave unto them: as the Apoſtle to the the Corinths writes, If there be firſt a willing minde, accepting of us, not according unto thoſe things we have not, but according unto thoſe things we have: And therefore, that her weak deſires and meaſure whatſoever given, might be accep­ted of God. For, ſhee could not deny, but her wiſhes were that ſhe might repent, and ſhe was in ſome ſort ſorry for her indiſpoſition and hardneſſe of heart, which being a burthen and a kinde of griefe unto her, was ſo a kinde and ſore of repentance: Therefore was ſhee exhorted to be patient, and not to limite the Holy One of125 Iſrael nor preſcribe the foun­taine and depth of all wiſedome which were the beſt way to bring her unto Heaven; but to ſubmit her ſelfe unto the good pleaſure of God; truſt, hope with the beſt, and uſe the meanes.

Thirdly, Further alleadging un­to her, That it was not the great­neſſe, number or continuance of our ſinnes that could ſtop mercy from us; but finall impenitency and obduration.

Fourthly, Repentance being the gift of God, which hee might at his pleaſure give and accept in good part whatſoever meaſure thereof he were pleaſed: It was not to be doubted of, but that ſhe might in time attaine unto ſo much thereof in the uſe of meanes, as hee would accept of, and as might bring her unto heaven. For126 God of all his Attributes is ſaid only to delight in mercy, Micah 7. his nature being to forgive and forget iniquity, tranſgreſſion, ſin and ſinnes of cuſtome.

Fifthly, That as ſinne was a per­petuall act in us, ſo in God there was a perpetuall act in pardoning of ſinne, not tranſient, but in a perpetuall conſtant current; as Zach. 13.1. a fountaine opened, ever running, to waſh away all ſinne and uncleanneſſes; with ma­ny the like things, which now a­gaine wonne her ſpirit to reſt up­on God; though now and then upon divers occaſions ſhe uſed to fly out a little: Yet being continu­ally hammered and hewen with the tough acute diſputations of this good man, Mr Hooker, who was very aſſiduouſly induſtrious in watching her diſpoſition, and127 various inclinations of her changes and tentations; by Gods mercy ſhee grew ſtill better, uſing to pre­ſent her ſelfe conſtantly to the uſe of meanes: having prayer, cate­chizing, expounding and reading of the word, and ſinging of Pſalms conſtantly in the family, now with delight and willingneſſe acted: being never weary to have the word expounded; yea, and in pri­vate ſpending ſome time by her­ſelfe alone daily; as the indiſpoſi­tion of her diſtempered body, heart-burning and in a manner perpetuall head-ach, would per­mit her; but yet would not bee known nor confeſſe unto any what in private ſhee did being alone.

The good ſoule is yet toſſed up and down.Now have wee her in the wil­derneſſe toſſed up and downe, like the Church in their march unto Ca­naan,128 fraught with divers ſtormes, now backwards, now forwards, with many turning and winding temptations, reſtleſſe in her thoughts, becauſe (deſire hath no reſt) having ſome glimmering glimpſe of hope, but (as ſhe faid) had no grounds for the ſame, ex­pecting when the Lord would bee pleaſed to work in her ſome great work for enabling. In which Caſe, now up, now down, the bet­ter ſhee grew in her minde, having ſtill therewithall the greater weak­neſſe and indiſpoſition of body, ſhe continued a long time, her old friend Mr Dod now and then once in a quarter of a year comming to viſite her, whom ſhe much rejoyced to ſee, praying not any more to ſtay ſo long away; for now ſhee reſted aſſured her time on earth was but of ſmall continuance. 129About which time it fell out, that Mr Hooker alſo having acted his part with her, and done his beſt, to comfort, uphold and rectifie her ſpirit, ſo fitting her for mer­cy, as nothing remained to bee done but a full gaile of ſpirituall winde to blow upon her, to bring forth her fruit, that by Gods Pro­vidence he was married unto her waiting-woman: After which both of them having lived ſome time after with her, and he cal'd to bee Lecturer at Chemsford in Eſſex,Maſter Hooker leaves her. they both left her, her Huſ­band having provided another for the Cure, but not like unto the other; who alſo came often to vi­ſite her, being much there. And there lived alſo two miles from thence, a worthy good Miniſter, one Mr Witherell of Waltham up­on Thames, whom ſhee went con­ſtantly130 to heare, and was alwayes very helpfull unto her (but eſpe­cially when Mr Hooker had thus left her) whom every Thurſday ſhee heard, hee being a painfull, able, good mercifull man, did then much help her, both in publike, and alſo in private helps of conference and expounding of the Word, which now ſhee much delighted in at all occaſions; eſpecially ſhee found a little comfort in opening of that chapter Micah 7. one time when Mr Dod was with her three Moneths before her death, though (as ſhee ſaid) ſhe durſt not acknow­ledge nor confeſſe the ſame for feare it had not been ſo.

But ah, ſhould I now lance forth into the diſcourſe of the loſſe of ſo good a friend?The pre­paration unto her death. but what ſay I of loſſe? No, ſhe was not loſt, ſhee was now found with131 her face ſtrongly bent home Heaven­wards: Having therefore thus far proceeded in this ſaid Trage-Co­micall diſcourſe, I muſt now pro­ceed to the Cataſtrophe thereof: If therefore good Reader, thou wilt have a little more patience to heare the reſt, thou ſhalt quickly ſee the Scene change with a joy­full Comicall concluſion: For though all this while ſhee hath gone forth weeping carrying pre­tious ſeed, now thou ſhalt ſee ber returne with ſheaves of everlaſting joy; though weeping hath beene many an evening, yet now thou ſhalt ſee joy come in an everlaſting morning. Though Satan hath much toyled, wearied out and vexed her ſpirit, yet thou ſhalt ſee how the God of peace ſhall ſhortly tread downe Satan under her feet: her reward infinitely ſurpaſſing all her132 momentany ſufferings; which now comes to bee the fourth and laſt thing propounded, Her death, and the preparation unto it.

Divers years ſince Mr Dod left her, and ſome large time alſo after that Mr Hooker was removed unto Chemsford, ſhee remained more chearefull in minde, though tor­mented with her heart-burning and in a manner perpetuall me­grum, which made her to lie much of the day upon her bed, unfit for any other actions of endeavor in the uſe of meanes ſhe would or ſhould otherwiſe be employed in. About this time a ſtrong diſtaſte was given her from a neare friend,A new griefe is added to the for­mer. (not neceſſary here to relate, nor to our purpoſe:) Which yet faſte­ned ſo upon her, that it grew more and more, and brought her into a poſture of great diſcontent, ſo as133 ſhee became in her thoughts a woman in ſome ſort of another world; who being reſolute in her way, unremoveable, having reſol­ved and alwayes purpoſing, when ſhee found her ſelfe neare unto her laſt, to die at her Fathers Houſe, and lie with her kindred and friends at Ammerſum, Shee ſuddenly told her Husband